Sunday, November 1, 2009


I remember when I was a kid, and I'd go trick-or-treating, and most years I'd make my own costumes, and they were all crap, you know, like the ghost, which was just an old sheet with two eye holes torn into it. Then, one year, my parents got me a superman costume, it even came with a mask, and on the side of the box that it came in, it had written. "WARNING - Do Not Attempt To Fly." I like to picture the kid that is actually stupid enough to think he could fly in the costume, but smart enough to check out the warning label before he put it on. The year when I had the superman costume, I got really annoyed, because of the mask, you know how it has that little piece of string that is stapled on, so your head stays in? Well, as with any of those masks, the string kept breaking, and I kept fixing it, and it kept getting tighter and tighter every time I fixed it, until I was at the point where the mask was cutting into my eyeballs and I was trying to breath through those little nose holes, and thinking, "I can't see and I can't breath, but I don't care! Where the hell is the candy?!"
But then, finally I had enough of the mask, and I grabbed it and I threw in to the ground. I remember the last years that I went trick-or-treating, I was a little too old for it. The people at the houses would always ask those same stupid questions. "What are you suppose to be young man?" "I'm suppose to be done by now, so give me the candy. I've got another 18 houses on this street, sweetheart. So shake a leg woman."
This year I decided to stay at home and get pissed off by all the kids ringing the doorbell saying "Trick or treat?"

Saturday, September 19, 2009


A friend of mine, who is in his 30's, got engaged about five years ago, but he didn't want to get married, and that's the closest he came to ever being married, and let me tell you, if you get engaged, but don't want to get married, it's more than a little tense. I got to be a best man at a wedding about two weeks ago, which was pretty good I thought, it was a pretty good title, you know, best man, which I thought was a bit too much, I thought there would be the groom, and a pretty good man, I thought that would be more than enough; if I'm the best man, why is she marrying him?
Men will never know what women want, and women will never know what men want, so for the women who read this, I'll let you in for what men want... men want woman, that's all we want, and that's all we know, how do we get women? We have no clue. You see men honking their car horns and waving out the window and hollering at good looking women, that is the best idea we've come up with so far; but that is still a pretty stupid idea; what is the woman suppose to do? Kick off the heels and start running down the street after the car. "It's a good thing you honked, otherwise how else would I have known how you felt?"
Men even went to the moon to look for women, you know how I know? Because they took that little buggy up with them, why else would you take a car if you weren't trying to impress a woman? That buggy was sooo a man idea, isn't going to the moon enough? You have to drive around on it now too?

Cabs and Planes.

For some reason I always feel safe in a taxi, the driver could be driving like a maniac and swerving through red lights, but I think, "Well, he's got a Cab Drivers License. He must know what he's doing, he's a professional." What qualifications do you need to become a taxi driver? I think a face is all you need. We will have no blank faces behind the wheel of cab. I think the only other qualification you need beside a face is a name with about six consonants in a row in it. What does the circle with the line through it mean? What planet does that come from? You need a periodic table to report the guy. "Yes, his name was Akmal, with the symbol for Boron."
What annoys me about the airport, it the price of everything in the stores. "Yes that's right, $15.50 for a tuna sandwich."
And on the plane, how they show you how to to put on your life jacket, and they show you how to put on the seat belt. Even if it is your first on a plane, it's pretty easy to put on the belt, do they think when they tell people how to put them on, they're saying. "Oh, you have to press the button to undo the belt, I was going to break the metal apart, or tear the fabric, if I could only get it started."
And when they tell you that if there is an accident, just put on your life jacket and you'll be right. If they were being realistic they'd say, "In the unlikely result of an accident, we'll likely go into the ground like a fucking dart."

Horse Racing.

I never really have much to do, so I'm always up for suggestions for things to do, and the other day, my uncle talked me into going to the track, to bet on the horses. I think the horses don't have any clue they're racing, they know the jockey must be in a hurry, but it must be confusing for the horse, because they were in a big hurry, and then they get to the end of the race, and they must be thinking, "This is the place we left from, if we just didn't leave we would've been the first ones back." And when they are going back to the shed, they wouldn't be thinking "Yes! I came first." They'd be thinking "Oat bag, I get my oat bag now." And I'm suppose to bet on these idiots. One thing I know the horses don't know, is that if they trip, and break their leg or something, they get their brains blown out, I think they're missing out on that nugget of information, if they knew that, they wouldn't be running so fast. I've been horse riding before, I'm just not good at it, and they don't give you a very good horse when you don't know how to ride. They said to me, "What level rider would you say you are?"
I said, "I don't know, zero, nothing, however the hell the system works... I can't do it, is that clear enough for you? I'm going where the horse wants to go. That's my level."
Then they go out the back and say, "Is Glue Stick back yet?"
Then I get on the back of this fat U shaped thing, it's the only horse in the joint where you could still put your feet flat on the ground while you were sitting on it... it was like I was riding a hammock. Then I'm riding this thing, and I have no clue what I'm doing, so it is just wandering around doing it's own thing, and then it just stops, and I'm going, "Oh, come on." Then it just looks up as if to say, "Yeah, I know what I'm doing Hop-a-long, I've done this track a million times... yeah, yeah, kick me a few more times while I'm taking a leak, that will help."
You know what I think is really bad about the horses life? The trailer they move them around in, with their rear ends sticking out, right in everyone's faces.
the horses are probably standing in there, talking to each other.
"Do you feel a draft Bill? I can't see anything back there, but it is awfully breezy, isn't it? You don't think our fat disgusting asses are sticking out the back of this trailer do you? Why would they do that to us? They already ride us and kick us while we're peeing, why stick our asses out of a truck?

My Three Rules Of Life.

My three rules of life, that I believe could really help you in life, are:
1) Bust your arse.
2) Pay attention.
3) Fall in love.
Bust your arse - Just work as hard as you can, you can't go wrong if just work as hard as you can, just work your arse off.
Pay attention - People don't noticed things enough, people don't see things until it hits them in the face, so pay attention to everything that is happening around you, absorb everything, ask questions, it'll help you learn.
Fall in love - This doesn't necessarily mean love in a romantic sense. The main thing I mean here is, appreciate everything good that happens, no matter how little, or insignificant it may seem, just be grateful for it, if you get a really good cup of coffee, really take time to notice it, think to yourself, "Yes, this is a really good coffee, it could be a terrible shitty coffee, but it's not." or if you get a good parking space... if something good happens, really appreciate it.

Monday, August 31, 2009

My Birthday.

I just thought I'd mention that it's my 16th birthday today, the 1st of September. Yay! I haven't gotten many gifts. :(

Sunday, August 30, 2009

Family and Dating.

I love my family, but at Christmas time... Good lord. At Christmas time, the entire family all meet up at my grandparents. As you walk in, it looks fine, but as you enter, "Nightmare on Elm Street." Grandpa takes out his teeth and starts eating his dinner like a frog, grandma forgets about the apple pie and it explodes in the oven. Aunt Betty, 92 years old, she's been dying for 47 years, but she still manages to make a toast, and finishes it by saying, "See you all next Christmas." And somebody mumbles, "Everybody except you." Everybody is thinking "How can you still be alive? You'll bury us all you witch." My only unmarried uncle feels like killing himself when Grandma starts talking about marriage. "We got married at 16, and we didn't even meet until the wedding day." He's there just smiling, but you can tell he's thinking, "Who cares?"

Imagine that, not seeing your wife until the wedding day. She's walking up the isle, she's got the vale on, you can't see her face, you're leaving the church, people are throwing rice, and it's getting in your eyes, so you still can't see her properly, then you get in the car and drive off. Then the cans on the back of the car come in handy, so when the car drives off, nobody can hear the husband going. "AAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!"

I recently broke up with a girl, and she said. "You'll never find anybody else like me." I thought "I should hope not." Do you break up with somebody then say, "By the way, do you have a twin?"

Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Sticking Up For Myself.

Only recently I have started sticking up for myself, most of my life, I have been shy and nervous, and tried to be as good as I possibly could, in other words, I was a grovelling little piss-ant. But now, I have started to stop caring what people think. Before, I would bottle my emotions, but now, I tell people what I think... they may hate me for it, but at least I feel better.

Petrol Prices.

I have found out, that we all need a cause: health care, schools, something bigger and more important than us, so we could really help others, and I've finally found mine, it is, find out who is responsible for the constant change in the price of petrol... and then kill them. I tell you what I am going to miss, I am going to miss big cares, because, let's be honest, it's going to be a bit difficult to loose your virginity in the back of one of those tiny smart cars. But the price of petrol going up and down like this, it's gone from $1.30 to $2.00 to $1.00; my friend said, "Well, that's the way it works." No, it's not. Nothing works like that, hamburgers aren't $6.00 then $30.00 then free; and are people still getting pulled in by the illusion of a saving? "Look Hun, this petrol station is selling petrol at $1.29 and this one is selling it at $1.28. We're eating teak tonight."
Let's just put petrol at one price and leave it.

Thursday, August 20, 2009

Getting Fit and Getting Old.

Working out at the gym, running, jogging, and any kind of thing like that, just is not for me, not at all. My friend who loves jogging and running, says after he goes for a big run up around a few blocks and up and down a massive hill and back, he gets this thing he calls a 'Runners High' but I can get the same feeling after eating a bag of Doritos and a hot dog and then walk up a flight of stairs. I tried going to the gym once, the trainer said, "You get addicted." I said, "No, I don't think so, I think I could quit the gym any time I want, I think I could quit the gym cold turkey, and then eat the cold turkey."
I don't mind if you like doing this stuff, just keep it away from me; just remember, every hour you spend at the gym, is an hour I'm sitting at the bar chatting up your girlfriend.
Another thing that annoys me, not as much as the working out, but it still annoys me, is how people are so afraid of getting old. Why are we so afraid of getting old? Each generation gets weaker and lazier, I don't care how old you are, your parents were twice as tough as you are, my father used to walk across town to get to school, and he works at night, but, if I go to the store, and the barber in the same day, then I need a nap. I am 16, so, I'm not even aloud to drink alcohol yet, but when my father was my age, he was leaving for the navy, and had his future planned out, I have done nothing about my future, and my biggest achievement in life has been owning all nine seasons of 'Seinfeld' and all eleven seasons of 'Frasier' on DVD. Isn't it weird, the only time you look forward to getting older, is when you're a little kid, when you're twelve or younger you're so excited you count in fractions, "I'm four and a half." You're never thirty-four and a half. Then when you reach your teenage years, you skip whole numbers, "I'm going to be 16." You could be 15, but you're going to be 16. Then, you become 21, you 'become' 21, it sounds like a big thing, but you turn 30, you 'turn' 30, it makes you sound like bad milk. Then, you are pushing 40, "oh, stay over there." Then, you reach 50, and you make it to 60, and then you've built up so much speed and momentum, that you hit 70. Then when you're in your 90's you start going backwards, "I was just 92." Then, if you are lucky enough to make it into your 100's then you become a little kid again, "I'm 104 and a half."

Wednesday, August 12, 2009


I've got some bad news... well, it's bad news for me. My grandfather just passed away. Only a couple of hours ago. I still can't get my head around it. Rest In Peace, old man.

George Hill - 2nd of February 1935 to 13th August 2009.

Thursday, July 30, 2009

The Start Of School.

Today was the last day of the first week back in term three, at least we got Monday off. My pop is still in hospital, he is better, but it looks like he is getting a small amount of dementia, but it might just be at the medicine is on. I'm working on another story, the two weeks off school really helped me get started.

Sunday, July 12, 2009


Holidays at last. The 10th was the last day of the term, so I have two weeks off school, so that's great. Even though I think school is great, I still think it is even better when I don't have to go, I can do my own things.

Now, on a more darker note, my grandfather is very ill, and it doesn't look like he is going to be alive much longer, I doubt he'll even make the week out, even though it is possible he'll pull through it, it is not very likely... so pop, I love you, and I really, really, hope you get through this.

Wednesday, July 1, 2009

Happy Birthday.

I would like to mention my fathers birthday. It was yesterday. The 30th of June. He turned 55, luckily he hardly ever uses the internet, so at least he won't find I'm telling the public how old he is... I don't think he would like that. But he's a great father and hope he has had a good day.

Wayne Potter... 30th June 1954.

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

My Pets.

These are all my lovely pets. Bindi, Bonnie and Sassy.

Monday, June 22, 2009

Ghosts Of Our Past.

...So do we pass the ghosts that haunt us later in our lives; they sit un-dramatically by the roadside like poor beggars, and we see them only from the corners of our eyes, if we see them at all. The idea that they have been waiting there for us rarely if ever crosses our minds. Yet they do wait, and when we have passed, they gather up their bundles of memory and fall in behind, treading in our footsteps and catching up, little by little.
-Stephen King.

Thursday, June 18, 2009

A Day In The Life Of Brayden Potter.

Today, was probably my best day in a pretty long time. I got the day off, so no school, and no work... well, none that I didn't like. I had a chance to catch up with a long lost friend of mine, sleep. Then after a nice hot cup of coffee, I went to the movie theatre and saw "The Land Of The Lost" starring Will Ferrell, and for those of you who haven't seen it, if you like Will Ferrel's humor, and like adventure movies, then you should like "The Land Of The Lost." Then when I got home, I sat down in front of my computer for almost three hours straight and started my new and improved story, titled "Night Crawlers." -When I make sure the first chapter is the way I want it, I will post it on here, so I can get some criticism- Then I sat down and had a chat with a friend of mine, who went over the first two chapters of my story, to tell me what he thought.
Now, maybe that sounds like a pretty boring day to most people, but for me, that is a pretty damn good day.